Rose Colored Lenses

[New look...I'm indecisive. It's late so I'll have to finish adding nick-nacks and updating in the morning...]

I had sort of a lazy day today. Normally that would sort of bug me, but I've been traveling a lot lately, and just got in from a trip home last night, so I just embraced the laziness for most of the day. :) I had to get my car inspected back in NC, and I wasn't expecting to have the amazing time that I did. Lots of meaningful conversations and deep friendships made deeper. God is good.

Recently I've been reading a lot in Exodus (no this isn't that other post being resurrected quite yet) and something in chapter 14 reminded me of a concept that my bible study leader last semester, Kelly Minter, brought up in her book that we studied titled No Other Gods. I have this strange feeling that I'm going to butcher this post, so I trust the Lord to do with it what He may in someone's day, because I guarantee you if you get anything from it, it did not come from my checked-out brain.
I know a few of you are familiar with this study (NOGS) either from my previous post or other bloggers, and some of you have done it or are currently. If it makes any difference to those of you thinking of looking into doing it, NOGS was extremely helpful and one of the most timely studies I've ever done. All 5 of us girls that were in the study are all in about the same season of life, and we all got something different from it because it is so specific to each individual and digging into your own walk with the Lord and the idols specific to you. Sorry I'm rambling...ok I like the study. Moving on. :)

Exodus 14. Moses is high-tailing it out of Egypt with the Israelites who are anxiously awaiting their every move. This is the famous parting of the red sea (or tomato soup if you're Bruce Almighty) chapter, but the part I wanted to tell you about is right before that Campbells miracle.

(v10-14)
"As Pharaoh approached, the Israelites looked up, and there were the Egyptians marching after them. They were terrified and cried out to the Lord. They said to Moses, "Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt? Didn't we say to you in Egypt, 'Leave us alone. Let us serve the Egyptians? It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians that to die in the desert."

Anybody ever asked for a death wish in thinking that it would be better to go back to a past that was more destructive than it's worth? Maybe not intentionally (and I don't mean death wish as harsh as that came out), but I'm sure we've all been there. Wishing for days that we just knew would make us happy again, maybe because they were more comfortable. "I'm tired of waiting...just take me back there where I knew how to 'do life'." A harmful or abusive relationship. A life with addictions of any kind. A place that seems easier to sink into and grow "numb" in, rather than pick yourself up and walk out of. We like to conveniently forget all those moments of pain and loss, of hurt and sorrow, and only remember the very few, if any, pleasant moments--as if those handful of smiles would be enough to carry us through a lifetime of regret. (I think that was a run-on.) I've been dealing with this in an area of my own here recently. Longing for a time when a superficial blanket of security, draped on by others opinions and acceptance, sustained my belief in myself and God's ability to use me. So much wrong in that sentence I'm not sure I could tackle it in one post if I wanted. Doubt. Self Loathing. Wallowing. Self-destruction. Lies. Insecurity. Loneliness. Fear. So much fear.

Why on earth with a description list like that would I voluntarily choose to think about taking a trip down memory lane? Because a part of me, no matter how twisted and destructive the rest of me was, liked who people thought I was. Happy. Together. Confident. Not at all struggling with the Lord. Sure of my purpose. I, however, was none of those things. I now find myself in much more of an honest place--secure in who I am because of Christ--and humbled by the ways He is using me despite the corner of the blanket I still try to utilize from time to time. So why the need to go back through an old role of film? Because I'm being challenged. I am out of my comfort zone and it is scary not to know what the future holds. I've been led to a new place and told to wait on some things. Waiting is hard. Really hard. Especially when the world around you promises a million replacements for your prize if you'll just allow yourself the distraction of a temporary pleasure fix. Something to make you feel ok about yourself in the meantime. And then it happens. You look over your shoulder to a time when the temporary at least felt secure, and the ugly fades away. Rose Colored Lenses.

The Israelites are needing some assurance that where they are going is better than where they've been. And so far, they are not convinced. "It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the dessert!" (14:12) They are somehow sure that abandonment is around the corner, not willing to trust the lighted step that is under their feet. They would rather live in slavery than trust the One that is leading them to freedom. I love the next part. "Moses answered the people, "Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still." (14:13-14)

So much in these two verses..
**Do not be afraid. God is not out to get you. He is goodness. And He will prevail.
**Stand firm--If we keep our face set upon the Lord (Isaiah 50:7) we will not be put to shame.
**Deliverance. If you notice, when the Lord promises to bring the people OUT, it is matched by His invitation to come IN. He will not bring you out and leave you. But He won't make you follow the rest of the way. It is your choice. Hold tight long enough for Him to do His thing.
**And did you read the rest?

"The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still."

I'll not comment on that last verse let it speak to you how it may. Cause it shouted at me.

Some goodbyes are meant to be a good thing. When God moves you on from something that is holding you captive, that is a good goodbye. Don't fall into the deception that you are missing out on something that was once there. If you say goodbye externally, make sure your heart doesn't remain attached to a memory that will prove empty or deceitful once you cross the red sea. Don't waste your grief and sadness over things that don't need to be mourned. Girlfriend, practice your princess wave and walk into newness with delight. Reclaim that ground that was taken from you and embrace your freedom with confidence and a dose of humility.

God is good, all the time. And all the time...GOD IS GOOD. :o)